i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
