That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize