he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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