she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
