you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize