who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
literally had 100 drinks last night.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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