singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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