I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
