She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
