I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
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