everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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