Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
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