Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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