She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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