Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize