How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
