I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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