I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
