If i come over, it means nothing
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
