WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
