I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
