Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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