Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
