In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
