I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize