I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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