you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
