do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Dear god my vagina.
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