he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
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His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
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he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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