We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Randomize
