i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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