She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
