I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
