scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
