Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I can't turn off my feet"
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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