I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
