Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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