Please don't use social media to get back at me.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Randomize
