my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
