It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
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