just tell him i said nine months
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress