My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.