soooo we both peed the bed last night...
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
