Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
