It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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