it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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