So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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