i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Randomize
