so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
