Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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