dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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