Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Terrible idea I love it
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
