We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
