5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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